Dear Ali: a review of Dear Girls by Ali Wong

Dear Ali: a Review of Ali Wong’s Dear Girls

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the arc of this book I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Dear Ali,

I was caught off guard by how much I enjoyed this book.

I’m not going to lie; I’m not a huge fan of comedy. I often find the jokes too easy and I don’t like laughter that feels so inorganic. This makes me really popular with the hubby as I am sure you can imagine. 

I was still excited to read your book, though. While I don’t always like stand up, I (for some reason) really like to read the memoirs comics write. Yours was, frankly, significantly better than most.

You were so frank and honest and it was touching to read how direct you were in a book that is marketed as a letter to your children. It was so sex positive and, as you know, it’s so unusual to read something that treats sex as so natural without handling it with kid gloves. I like that you were real about your mistakes, but just as real about how beneficial some mistakes can be. 

I loved that you talked about your bush. That probably sounds weird, but again, it feels like most writing about body positivity is so contrived. Like people are always complaining about the same body parts in the same ways. The truth is, body hair can be really annoying and embarrassing and I love that you highlighted such a non-cliché struggle women face. And fuck that guy who told you that you had too much hair! Did he shave his balls? I’m guessing no.

No one asked for a favorite thing about the book, but I have to say, it’s your views on Motherhood. You are so real, so authentic. Again, its not the same old story of that time you accidentally sent the baby to school in mismatched socks (gasp!). It’s a look at (and a laugh at) how relentless and exhausting and worrying motherhood can be. 

This book was at once light and funny and also serious and profound. It was dark truths told in a way that made you stifle a guilty giggle. It was fun, and decadent, and irreverent, but also clever.

Dear Ali, I loved it.

4/5

One Night Read: a review of One Night Gone by Tara Laskowski

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the arc of this book that I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Now I have to actually write that review, and that is the hard part. It’s going to be hard because, frankly, I was just so in the middle about this book. Nothing was horrible, but nothing was particularly good, either. 

One Night Gone is going to be a hard one for me to review, simply because I feel really ambivalent about it. I liked it. It was a fast, easy read, which—lets be honest—is what you want out of a mystery. The multiple perspectives format seems to be almost the norm in a thriller these days, so that was almost expected. The storyline itself was fine. 

One Night Gone is the story of Allison, a recently divorced meteorologist who takes a job as a house sitter in a beach town while contemplating her next move. While there, she meets Tammy, a local, and is quickly embroiled in a decades old disappearing person mystery. There are all the basic themes that we’ve all come to associate with small beach towns: class issues, family secrets, and lots and lots of infidelity. 

I don’t really have any problems with One Night Gone except that there was a lot of what felt familiar and kind of cliched and everything interesting and different fell flat. We have these characters with rich potential: Allison has some mental health issues, Maureen is a carnie, Tammy has an ailing mother that she is responsible for. All this great potential to deepen the story, but instead we have mostly interchangeable characters with little that sets them apart. Like the rest of the story, it was just fine. To me, this is a book I could recommend to someone who sees it in stock at the library, but wouldn’t recommend buying. It’s a quick read, the story is very easy to get into, and it’s entertaining. It’s just nothing to write home about.

3/5

This book would definitely be banned in Big Burr: A reviewof Under the Rainbow

A review of Celia Laskey's Under the Rainbow

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC of Under the Rainbow that I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

I really liked this book and not just for the obvious reasons. Yes, it had an interesting plot that really drove the story. Yes, the characters were well-written and felt very authentic. But there is a lor more to it than that. The style, that of a composite novel told in non-repeating shifting perspectives (which I was really resistant to at first) actually showed the evolution of the town and the way all the interactions did eventually feed off each other. It really served to make Big Burr the main character, as it should be.

This book reminds me a lot of Sherwood Anderson's Winesburg, Ohio, and not just because of the composite novel form. Also, in many ways its almost like an update of the plot: a quiet, idyllic small town where one would suspect innocence is really harboring darkness beneath the surface. Not too earth shaking when I describe it like that, but mixed in with the idea that this small town (Bigg Burr Kansas), "the most homophobic town in the country" is--and I am struggling to find the right word because everything that captures how the residents would feel, like invaded by, feel problematic to be as a staunch LGBT supporter--visited by a task force of LGBTQ advocated who have agreed to spend two years trying to bring around the bigoted community, it is really a pretty complex and engaging novel with a lot of really interesting moments.

Deep and Darkest Page Turner: a review of Anna-Marie McLemore’s Dark and Deepest Red

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC of the beautiful Dark and Deepest Red that I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

With a talent for weaving a story that rivals that of Neil Gaiman, Anna-Marie McLemore has created a dazzling and heartbreaking fairy tale with her newest book, Dark and Deepest Red. 

Starting with the fascinating story of the dancing plague of 1518, McLemore crafts a tale that challenges the idea that the past ever leaves us alone. 

Emil is a scientist, Rosella a strong willed artisan, Lala a girl who loves with all the loyalty and fire she can muster. Despite two timelines that keep their worlds separate, the three lives intertwine as each struggles to find their own spot within their culture, family, and community. Faced with the same question, each must come to their own question: should they deny what makes them unique in order to blend in to their communities, or should they reclaim their own roots to fulfill their own destinies? How do you save yourself from the curses of the past? 

The novel Dark and Deepest Red is one that will stay with me— fitting for a novel that teaches the importance of history. Pushing all that aside, straying from ideas of themes, all I can say is that this was the most beautifully written, breathtaking story I might’ve ever read. Anna-Marie McLemore’s lyrical, poetic language dances alongside the victims of the fever, capturing you more and more with its spell. I couldn’t stop reading it. At times, I couldn’t stop the tears. I was so invested in the fates of these characters that at times, I could barely catch my breath.

Despite the praise I’ve lavished upon the text, I won’t say that it’s perfect: the more modern timeline is ever so slightly less compelling than that of the 1518 Strasbourg timeline. But that’s almost not worth mentioning and resolves itself in time. How can you really care about that when you have a novel that takes one of the most fascinating phenomena in history—the dancing plague—and weaves it into a gut wrenching fairy story of love and passion? Short answer: you can’t. It’s beautiful. Buy it now.

Yay, the feminist is coming: Lindy West’s The Witches are Coming

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC of the amazing The Witches are Coming that I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

From her stint as a writer for Jezebel to her amazing book Shrill, I’ve been a fan of Lindy West. I was so excited when I saw that The Witches are Coming was available to request from NetGalley that I smashed that request button. Later that evening, when my request was approved, it’s possible that I squeaked in delight.

The Witches are Coming did not disappoint. With West’s sharp tongue and shrewd observation, I found myself in a constant state of underlining and nodding. With passages such as: “Art has no obligation to evolve, but it has a powerful incentive to do so. Art that is static, that captures a dead moment, is nothing. It is, at best, nostalgia; at worst, it can be a blight on our sense of who we are, a shame we pack away,” West sums up the battle currently being waged in America between those who long for a more compassionate, sensitive type of entertainment and those who want only to preserve, despite the lack of merit in doing so. Making no apologies for the truth she speaks, West is a soldier with her pen. 

The best piece in this collection, I think, was “Joan,” a piece that really highlights the complexities of being a female entertainer. She points out the ways in which female entertainers are pitted against each other, although she adds that it is not as bad as it was when Joan Rivers was struggling to make her way to the top. No longer can there “only be one.” 

This book is a must read for anyone interested in gender, intersectional feminism, or simply pop culture. Witty and clever, West doesn’t disappoint at entertaining. 

5/5

So, Everything I “Knew” was Wrong: a Review of Dave Cullen’s Columbine

I was a freshman in high school when Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold committed their heinous crime against their peers at Columbine High School. An unpopular, often bullied teen girl,I didn’t relate to the two boys, but I did feel sad for them. So shunned and alienated that they felt they had no other option, they had resorted to the unthinkable...

So imagine my surprise when I found out that nearly everything I remember from the media coverage surrounding the shooting was wrong. The boys weren’t in the “Trench Coat Mafia.” They weren’t bullied (and in fact often bullied younger students and people from marginalized groups). They came from normal families with decent incomes and Eric even had a date for prom. In other words, after reading Columbine by Dave Cullen, it seems more like Eric and Dylan we’re bored suburbanites suffering from mild affluenza than the outcasts I have spent my life believing they were.

While the correction of the media portrayal of Dylan and Eric was by far the element that I was most interested in, that’s not the only revelation the book discusses. Cullen explores the impact of the shooting on local religious groups, the truth behind the alleged martyrdom of Cassie Bernal, and the personal effects: things like depression, the dissolution of marriages, and more.

Columbine shone an in-depth and vivid, yet respectful, light on what will always stand out to me as the very unfortunate beginning of something. While the massacre at Columbine was certainly not the first school shooting on America’s soil, it is the first I was aware of and the one that stunned me to my core. It was the one that made me wake up to the fact that bad things could happen at school. Now, twenty years later, school shootings get a day or two of media coverage and are largely forgotten. Columbine, as Dave Cullen tells his audience, was first page news in The New York Times every day for two weeks. 

While this book doesn’t have a blatant message, it definitely shows us how much our culture has changed as school shootings have become all too common. Constantly showing a new angle, yet easy to follow and understand, this book was a page turner from the opening. I would recommend this very strongly with the warning that it isn’t easy to read.

4.5/5

ICYMI BOOK PICK: Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire (Wayward Children #1)

I know you are never supposed to judge a book by its cover, but sometimes they're just so beautiful, I can't resist. This is one of those; a sturdy wooden door with a forest backdrop. A sunset. It gave me all the feels as soon as I picked it up.

Seanan McGuire's Every Heart a Doorway is the first in a series, but from what I've read on Goodreads, they each seem to be standalone (at least to some extent). the first book is focused on Nancy, the newest arrival at Miss Eleanor's home for Wayward Children. At first, I was hesitant to read this book. The name of the school sounded a bit too much like a Home for Peculiar Children rip-off but, while there are definitely similarities (supernatural elements, outcasts living under the roof of a loving, eccentric woman), that's not the case. The children at Miss Eleanor's are all united by a different quirky detail: they have all been kicked out of their magic
worlds (think Wonderland, Narnia) and have to acclimate to being back in the "real world."

Nancy is an outcast from the Land of the Dead and she is not into the brightness of the world around her. She's all about stillness, so the characters living around her are a bit much, particularly her roommate. It seems like Nancy is going to quietly bide her time until she can get home, but before that can happen, the borders start.

Part fantasy, part mystery, this book is ultimately a whodunit and why novel. The setting gives it a new depth and I found the idea behind it (what happens to kids who come back from fairyland) really fun and unique. All in all, great premise. The characters, too, were pretty cool: Kade, a trans boy who had to leave his land when he couldn’t be a princess, Jack and Jill, sisters, from some sort of war zone, and Nancy, who is asexual, all provided some diversity and I was about it. Nancy, though, was pretty flat and whole that’s part of her storyline, it felt lazy to me. Something could’ve made her a bit more dynamic. While I enjoyed the book, I was still glad her particular story was over. That said, the ending, too, was too easy. I won’t go into detail to avoid spoilers, but the ending felt too sudden and just wrapped things up too neatly. There were huge pacing issues. At just under 200 pages, there was definitely room to develop the ending a bit more and take some time to explore. As it stands now, it’s very abrupt.

All that said, I liked this book a lot more than I disliked it. The whimsical plot and lively cast of characters kept me entertained. I’ve already checked book four of the series out of the library (obviously I hate to read things out of order, but since they didn’t have the other two and these are standalone, I said what the heck) and I’m excited to read the therapist’s story. I’ll let you know what I think.

Happy reading!

An Even and Rewarding Short Story Collection: We Love Anderson Cooper by RL Maizes

First, a big thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC of We Love Anderson Cooper written by R.L. Maizes.


This was a pretty even short story collection. While there were some standouts, none of the included stories were bad or particularly weak with one exception that I will explain below. They all shared a very subtle style and they all touched on different elements of humanity.

The standouts, to me, stood out in a big way. "We Love Anderson Cooper," the story of a soon to be Bar
Mitzvahed young man who was struggling with his sexuality,  was both heartbreaking and hilarious. It was particularly strong because the plot of the story never overshadowed the authenticity of what I saw as the real struggle: figuring out that becoming an adult means balancing your own needs with the way your actions affect others.

Another really strong story was "Tattoo," which I read twice and would like to revisit a third time. Of all the stories in the collection, this was the one that most sucked me in because there was something happening below the surface that I wanted to figure out. I'm not sure I have. don't misunderstand me: this isn't some confusing, dark and twisty story. While there is definitely magical realism at work in this one, the plot itself is very straight forward. There's just a lot of social commentary that I want to fully think through. This story was my favorite of the bunch.

As I mentioned above, only one story in the collection really missed the mark for me and that was "Collections." It's not that I didn't enjoy the story. It was fine. It's just that it didn't reach the quality that the other stories had and, frankly, when I was thinking about writing this review and revisited the Table of Contents, I couldn't remember reading it. It was just a very bland story and I think that being mediocre made it stand out because the rest were so strong.

The rest of the stories cover some of the uglier elements of humanity: infidelity, bitterness, becoming a cat. they are solidly good, steady reads. I'll say this: if you like character driven stories over plot heavy writing, these stories are for you. They are like a tooth with an exposed nerve; they show the things about human nature that we'd probably rather avoid. This, to me, is a must read.

Monday Review: Orpheus Girl by Brynne Rebele-Henry

Thank you to NetGalley, Brynne Rebele-Henry, and the publishers for the free E-ARC I received of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

I have to say, I was super stoked to read this book. Let's be real: the subject matter is really hot right now. right? With both The Miseducation of Cameron Post and Boy, Erased being adapted for film, as well as a Vice President of The US who is in favor of them, Conversion therapy centers are a big part of the conversation going on. And, let's be real, it's a conversation that should've been happening at much louder decibels much sooner: these places are basically torture chambers for LGBT kids.

Brynne Rebele-Henry does a really nice job of showing that in her book. With the story of two lesbian teens, Raya and Sarah,  in love, she paints a picture of just how dangerous life can still be for LGBT youth in America, especially in the rural South. With her depiction of Conversion Camps, she doesn't turn away from the pain that these kids undergo, but she also doesn't relish in exploiting that pain. I feel like Rebele-Henry does a really nice job of walking right up to the line between authentic and honest and a bit gratuitous and landing on the right side.

That said, there are a lot of things about this book that read like a first novel (which it is). It's short and feels exceptionally rushed all throughout the middle. The build up in the conversion camp is non-existent: it goes from 1-100 in a day. I'm not saying that's inaccurate: I honestly don't know what the schedule of tortures looks like at one of those places. either way, though, for a story, the pacing doesn't work.

Another issue I had with the book was that it was hyper repetitive in some places. To the point that I think some passages almost entirely repeat. I wasn't sure if that was intentional--maybe to show the slowing of thoughts due to some of the torment Raya goes through--but if it was, it could be made to read as more intentional.

Finally, I had very little sense of setting here.  I know that Raya and Sarah are from a small town and I'm guessing it's a Southern one, but when are we? The fashion of the "popular girls" (frosty blue eyeliner, especially), made me think we are in the early aughts, but then a girl at the camp said that in most places, being gay was considered normal, so I thought maybe closer to present? Given that gay marriage was only legalized in the US four years ago, it makes a pretty big difference in terms of the context of the book.

All that said, the flaws are totally forgivable issues that might make an avid reader pause, but that don't take anything away from the importance of the work. So often, I hear kids talk about how it's no big deal to be gay anymore, that there's no risk to LGBT youth, but these torture chambers are only illegal in 15 out of 50 states. That means (ignoring the increased risk of homelessness, assault, etc) if nothing else, in 35 states, they face this risk. This is a must read for people who need to know what being gay can mean, even today.

4/5 stars.

Love Note to the Dark Teenage Comedies of a Better Generation: A Review of Laurie Petrou's Love, Heather

"I want to burn everything to the ground and emerge brand new: a strong, happy, funny, confident Phoenix--Love Heather, Laurie Petrou

The sentiment of wanting to burn everything down isn't new, particularly when we are talking about high school students. I'm sure not all of us, but equally sure a lot of us, can empathize with that idea. Maybe you've even had it yourself a time or two. It's not even an earth shatteringly different idea for a kid in a fiction novel to try to do just that: to create chaos, to right wrongs, to get revenge. This book isn't shocking and it's plot isn't a revolutionary one. The cool thing is, that's not the point at all.

Love, Heather is about the pain you feel when you find yourself alone. High school freshman, Stevie, is alone. Her parents divorced and both her mom and her dad are more worried about making their new lives than trying to make sure Stevie's life is working out. Her best friend since childhood, Lottie, has started hanging out with a new crowd (friendship breakups: what's more relate-able than that?). In short, everyone that Stevie should be able to count on is gone.

Enter Dee, a new friend who helps Stevie find the power to burn it all to the ground. Who seems to know her thoughts from the inside out. Who is exactly what Stevie was missing.

Now, given the title and references to the book, it's pretty clear that "Dee" is just a platonic, female version of J.D. from Heathers. Even the name smacks of intertextuality, so this goes a little deeper than mild references (hello, even the title and movement within the book is a nod to the film). That's not to say you can't enjoy this book if you haven't seen Heathers, but honestly, if you haven't I have two questions for you: what's your damage? Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast? Watch it. Winona Ryder, Shannon Doherty, Christian Slater . . . there's no risk here.

Movie gushing aside, this book was really good. Personal overshare here: I have three children, so while I read more than most, it takes a lot for me to put it all on hold and read for hours on end. I had trouble putting this one down because a) there's a thing I wanted to see if I was right about and b) it was really fast paced and enjoyable.

Okay, so you know how books about high school usually fall into the two extremes of being overly precious or so overly dramatic they read like a Lifetime movie script? this one, one that had so much chance of going totally off the cliff, really didn't. It felt very authentic to what it's like to be in that weird, liminal space of adolescence. sure, Stevie was self-absorbed and had a tendency to make things about her: isn't that the hallmark of being a teenager? But the other stuff, the big, thematic stuff, worked. Petrou discussed sexuality and gender and consent in ways that actually felt like they were just things the character was experiencing, rather than some super edgy, look-at-this-social-problem manifesto. this is a worthwhile read for anyone middle school aged or older. Obviously it's a bit dark for anyone younger than that and I'm sure many will even say it's too much for a middle school kid, but. . . I would argue they are forgetting what middle school really looks like. This is it, y'all. This is youth at its meanest and most honest.

Loved it.

5/5

If you are Lost, find this: a review of We are Lost and Found by Helene Dunbar

Thanks to NetGalley and the publishers for the EARC I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Before I read Helene Dunbar’s We are Lost and Found, I read a blurb comparing it to The Perks of Being a Wallflower. I couldn’t help but do a (figurative) double take since PoBaW, Stephen Chbosky’s coming of age masterpiece is pretty much my go to read when I want to really think about the high school experience for anyone who doesn’t fit neatly into a clique. In other words, a pretty high bar was set before I even started reading.

I have to say, this book totally lived up to my expectations. It was heartbreaking and raw and addressed things head on. So head on, in fact, that you flinch as you feel them coming towards you. 

We are Lost and Found focuses primarily on our main character, Michael, his best friends, Becky and James, and his brother Connor. All the male characters are young, gay males struggling with their sexualities at the beginning of the AIDS epidemic in NYC. The book asks questions that, while specific to the epidemic, are still timely today: how do teens minimize the risks to their bodies while exploring their sexualities? How can you protect yourself when it requires so much faith in other people? How can you have faith when your life experiences are telling you not to?

Tackling the issues of STIs, sexuality, love, commitment, and familial stress, We are Lost and Found is an authentic and genuine journey through the angst of adolescence. It faces these issues without being overwrought or soap operaesque. It’s painful, thoughtful, sweet, and hopeful. This is the book every teen should read this year.

The Perfect Review . . . of The Perfect Child by Lucinda Berry

Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC of this book that I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Half the time, unless I find it to be just dreadful, I don't even write about endings. Endings, to me, are such a small part of the book that unless they are just dreadful, they just aren't that important. they are a way to wrap things up, which is always my least favorite part. That's why it will probably seem unusual that for this book, Lucinda Berry's The Perfect Child, I'm going to (no spoilers!) talk about the ending first.

I wasn't bothered by the ending of this book. A lot of people really, really were. In fact, if you spend three minutes on Goodreads looking at reviews of this book, that is by far the most common review point: no ending. Now, I get that complaint. Technically, it is a bit open-ended. But seriously, only technically. Like I said above, I won't give you spoilers, but what I'll say is this: the event that the book ends on is outlined enough in the pages leading up to the end that readers should get a sense of closure. The major question that is asked throughout the book is answered (although I will say that anyone who has ever read a book will know the answer pretty much from the jump). There is official closure. The book does have an ending.

All that said, I don't know how I felt about this book.

Once I was able to get into it, I read it pretty quickly. I kind of had trouble getting myself to read it at first, but once I started *actually* reading (you readers know what I mean) I finished it in two days. It's a quick, easy read and there's enough consistent action that I was sucked in.

that said, what's with all these books having such a gross, anti-adoption undertone? Before someone says I'm reading too much into it, let's be real: the attitude is very much "because she's a bit troubled, this adopted kid is not our actual family." it is there and it is blatant enough that a family member even says it.

Now, I can already hear your protestations: but Bib, she's evil. the child is evil.

Okay, that's true, but biological children can be evil. Biological children can be rapists, murdered, thieves, whatever. There is just as much chance of that. and don't we see it on the news all the time: when children mess up in huge ways that hurt people, their parents, for the most part, are still their parents. I'm not sure it's fair to the adoptee-adoptor relationship to suggest that most adoptive parents aren't just as loyal to their non-biological children.

and speaking of not fair: Christopher, whyyyyy? why are you, and basically all men in similar books (think Baby Teeth) such gaslighting buttholes to your practical, logical wives? Do you have no respect for them? Do you think they're dumb? why do men treat their wives live crazy, irrational children in this whole evil-child genre? It's a bit upsetting.


In summation: this was a quick and easy read that, despite making me want to throw it once or thrice, was worth the couple hours it would take to read it. 3.5/5 stars.

Have you heard about The Rumor... by Lesley Kara?

Thanks to NetGalley and the publishers for this ARC that I received in exchange for a fair and honest review.

In Lesley Kara’s The Rumor, our main character has moved back to her home town after her son needs to leave the school where he is shamelessly bullied and tormented. When she gets to her hometown, she spreads a rumor to get in with the other moms out of desperation to keep Alfie from being victimized a second time. Predictably, the rumor spreads quickly and proves to be quite disruptive for their seaside town. 

The Rumor reminded me of a cross between Liane Moriarty’s Big Little Lies and TJ Stinson’s The picture of Innocence. One of those comparisons helped the book; the other made me like it considerably less.  The Mommy politics, drama starting, and gossip spreading in a small, seaside town was the part that was reminiscent of BLL and aside from being a bit more preachy (the admonishment of gossips was pretty consistent and a bit over done), that part worked well. It felt real and engaging, and I was very excited to find out who Sally was. Very excited that it, until I found out.

That’s the part that reminded me of TJ Stimson. I won’t go in to anymore details to avoid spoilers, but the two books were too similar for my taste. 

The Rumor was a well written book, although a bit plodding at times. To have a partner who is a reporter and seems to value her intellect, Joanna seems a bit dull witted sometimes. I will say this, though: I really thought I knew who the bad guy was and I was wrong. I also was completely shocked by the twist at the end, BUT I didn’t care for it. It was too gimmicky. 

3.5/5

Hello, (Nearly) Perfect: A Review of Goodbye Perfect by Sara Barnard

First, thanks to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC I was given in exchange for a fair and honest review. I did end up buying a copy because I could never figure out how to open the file, but it was well worth paying for.

Goodbye, Perfect is the story of a teenage girl named Eden whose best friend is a bit perfect. At least, on the surface (isn't that always the way?). She gets great grades while Eden flounders; her parents are steady, if a bit overbearing, while Eden was adopted after years of foster care, and she never gets in trouble, while Eden had a rough couple of years. then one day, Bonnie, Eden's best friend, shocks everyone by running away with her music teacher.

On the surface, this book is about Eden's struggle to navigate the ethics of a tricky situation. Who deserves her loyalty? Bonnie, who disappeared after keeping a huge secret from her best friend? Her mother, Carolyn, who has loved her with unwavering patience and compassion?

It turns out, though, that Goodbye, Perfect is about so much more than that. It's about realizing no one is perfect and that the people we love might not always meet our expectations. It's about learning sometimes the people we write off are the ones most deserving of our love. Mostly, though, it's about learning what love really is: love isn't selfish and reckless and while you might be willing to give up everything for someone you love, someone who loves you wouldn't ask you to.

This is a really lovely book with many layers that would make it a good read for basically anyone. 4.5/5

The Apology by Eve Ensler: a review

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for this ARC of The Apology by Eve Ensler. I was given this ARC in exchange for a fair and honest review.

It’s that old dilemma: how do you review a book when you didn’t enjoy it, but you know, objectively, that it is very good?

I’ll confess: my issue while reading this book is my own. This is a book written by a victim of abuse, but told through the imagined words of her abuser. It is triggering, rage inducing, heartbreaking, and stomach churning. It was also beautiful. 

There was nothing but artistry in this book; somehow, the poisonous, abusive, cruel father becomes three dimensional and layered and his psyche is explored with the kind of skill that would make any writer envious. For most people, it would be impossible to revisit trauma so vivid and so raw and still look honestly and compassionately into the mind of the person who committed such cruelty upon you. Ensler not only does it, not only crafts a complex, rich character, she does it beautifully and with lyric, flowing prose that almost takes the stinger from the painful content. Key word: almost. 

While I can’t help but laud Eve Ensler’s talent, that didn’t mean the book was enjoyable. It was explicit and painful, so much so that at one point, I really didn’t think I was going to be able to continue reading. The writing is triggering for victims of sexual abuse, but empowering, too: Ensler’s scathing honesty sears through every page. I cannot tell you that you will love this book: it is painful. I also can’t tell you not to read it. I believe everyone must. It’s so important. This story is more common than we know and Ensler makes you feel her pain. She brings the issue to life. Ultimately, no matter how hard to read, this was a must read. After all, I couldn’t look away, even when I was desperate to.

5/5

What I Want to Talk About is What My Mother and I Don't Talk About

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC I was given of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

This one had me at hello. Partially due to the hype surrounding it (it has been hyped as one of the books you can't miss this year), but also because there are very few relationships as fraught as the relationship between mother and child. As Michele Filgate writes in her beautiful, gut wrenching opening essay: "Our mothers are our first homes, and that's why we're always trying to return to them." Sure, some of the homes in this essay are dilapidated, drafty places that offer little comfort, but if that's not fodder for the essay, what is?

Like any anthology, there are some essays in this collection that standout a bit more than others and, for me, the brightest star in this collection was "Thesmophoria," an essay written by Melissa Febos about a daughter who continuously pulls away from her hippie mother, despite her mom's unconditional love and support. This essay stood out to because the content was compelling, but the author didn't rely on her salacious background; instead, she used a rich form of mythology weaving to create something poignant and new. Now, I will admit, I'm a big fan of the braided essay in general and mythology, as well, so this one was an easy to sell to me, but any time you have an essay that mentions the author's heroin addiction without the author relying on gritty details to make her case, I'm impressed.

Another standout for me was the second essay, "My Mother's (Gate)Keeper." I liked it because it felt so familiar without being familiar at all. I have never had a set of married parents, so I can't relate to the writer's parents dynamic of enmeshment at all, but somehow it felt so relatable to me as a reader. It was authentic and fun. Even though Cathi Hanauer was talking about saerious issues (the way her father's controlling nature has damaged her ability to have a personal relationship with her mom), you can feel her affection for her father and her own ability to poke fun at her family. It feels warm rather than dramatic and was very readable.

In terms of the weak essays, there weren't really in. Sure, there were a few that weren't as compelling to me, personally, but none of them were bad essays. They were really interesting and they highlighted a variety of voices and issues. I think this is an important collection and I would recommend it to anyone.

Sharpen Sticks and Get Ready for Girls with Sharp Sticks by Suzanne Young

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for the ARC I was given in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Girls with Sharp Sticks, the razor sharp, fiercely clever new book by author Suzanne Young, is the kind of book you will hate to put down. Be warned, though: once you read its final pages and do put it down, you still won't be free from the thrall of this book.

Philomena Rhodes is beautiful. All the girls at the academy are beautiful, poised, perfect--and when they aren't, their behavior is swiftly corrected by the men who rule them with iron fists. What happens when these perfect little girls start to question their own autonomy (or lack thereof)? what happens when you try to keep power from girls?

Girls with Sharp Sticks is a dystopian novel with a definite feminist twist, but don't let that stop you from getting your copy (not that it should, but I won't get preachy on that): the plot is so heart poundingly gripping that you won't be left with a lesson or moral lingering over your head. Instead, you'll be left with philosophical questions about the very nature of humanity. Without giving spoilers, after reading this book, it's definitely my belief that humanity is less black and white than we assume it is.

Do you know what I loved most about this book? It inspired me to ask questions that are so relevant to the direction technology is steering us. As I reached the conclusion, I held my breath as I waited to see where the book was going to take me, but I also texted my husband to ask him to enter into hypothetical situations with me that were completely inspired by the text. there's so much fodder for interesting discussion, so many things to think about. I really enjoyed getting lost in the academy, but I have a feeling that Philomena will be able to leave this world behind more easily than I will.

5/5: This book is a must read. Do not miss it.

Best Read of the Year: Review of The Grace Year by Kim Liggett

A big thanks to NetGalley for the ARC I was given of The Grace Year in exchange for a fair and honest review.

You might be wondering: what would a book that blended The Handmaid’s Tale and The Hunger Games look like?

That’s a very simplistic read of Kim Liggett’s beautiful, haunting novel, but the similarities are there. Every year, the girls in Tierney’s village are sent away to a secret destination to be rid of the “magic” that women have in order to allow them to successfully step into their roles as wives.  Of course a shrewd reader will know from the beginning that “ridding the girls of magic” really translates to breaking their spirits to form obedient wives. As you might imagine, The Grace Year (which is shrouded in mystery because it is protected by a Fight Club level rule of secrecy) is not fun. It is designed to break the girls down in unimaginable ways.

So, what would it look like? If Kim Liggett wrote it, it would look a lot like a masterpiece and no, I don’t think I’m overselling this. The book was hauntingly written in a lyrical, almost hypnotic style, but still managed to keep the tension physical and thick. I could not stop reading this book. First and foremost, this is the story of women and how we are taught from birth to see each other as competition. It is about our internalized misogyny. But it’s also about the way that can and will change if people continue to make changes when they can. Even the “villain” was well developed and deserving of sympathy. I fell in love with these girls and their pain, but man, Tierney. I was obsessed with Tierney and her story: she was strong and brave, but also beaten down by life. She was flawed: as her mother says early in the novel, “[her] eyes are wide open, but [she] see[s] nothing.” It is her experience that creates a deep inability to trust that at times really blurs her ability to see truth.

Small spoiler alert: there’s a love story here and it’s really, really lovely. Normally I hate love stories in this kind of book. Like, you’re dirty and starving and maybe gonna die, but why not take some time to get all swoony? This is not that. It felt authentic and natural, yes, but it also gave the first glimpse of hope in a novel that was readable bleak.

I know it’s only February and this is slightly premature, but this is for sure on the short list for my absolute favorite book of the year. It has been months since I’ve read anything that hit me this physically, this stayed with me this long, that affected me so profoundly. I truly loved this book.

5:/5: Must Read.

Horse and Rider? What? My Review of Tame Your Anxiety by Loretta Graziano Breuning

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC of this book that I was given in exchange for a fair and honest review.

As a nearly lifelong anxiety sufferer (I was in fifth grade when I started having full blown panic attacks, but had anxiety stomach pain as early as second), I always love to check out new books that claim to help with the anxious mind. Anxiety sucks, y'all, and anything that can help is a lifesaver.

I was nearly thirty percent of the way through this book before Breuning started actually discussing ways to handle anxiety. Waiting to get past all the scientific explanations that I'd read a thousand times (and assume other anxiety sufferers will also know) to actually get to help with my anxiety gave me anxiety. Not only did I not like how slow this book was to get started, but Breuning uses this incredibly weird extended metaphor of a horse and a rider that felt totally unnecessary. Have you ever been trying to explain something, but you aren't sure if you are making your point so you keep providing more and more basic examples to try to make things clearer? That was the whole beginning of this book. Every couple [pages it was a new hypothetical scenario that would honestly have been much more appropriate had she been addressing children. Maybe Bruening should write a children's anxiety book.

Then, finally, we get to the meat of the book and Bruening starts to unveil her big strategy, which she says will tame anxiety if you do it every day. Awesome, right? We can finally get to the real heart of things. Except no, because immediately after revealing her strategy, we are in the jungle and rather than explaining how to implement her approach, she's back to convincing us it will work. there is way too much filler in this book and not even close to enough content. In a 160 page book, nearly half of it is useless to anyone who knows even the basics of how anxiety works.

I don't want to give a big spoiler alert and reveal her three steps, but no. they were not practical, they couldn't easily be applied while anxious, and they're less concise versions of books that have just explained it better.

Two summers ago, I read DARE: the New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks, by Barry McDonagh. It is my suggestion that you return Tame Your Anxiety and pick up Dare instead because it was actually easy to follow and contained implementable steps to dealing with anxiety. It was a life changer.

This Book IS the One: A Review of Keris Stainton's The One Who's Not the One

Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC I was provided in exchange for my fair and honest review.

Let me set the stage: it was late. I had read yet another book of my favorite genre (thriller) only to be totally disappointed by the predictability and cliches. I decided it was time to branch out more, to make a push towards other genres of reading. This book, The One Who's Not the One, sounded like it was the exact book to expand my horizons.

It's a cute book. Honestly, if I sit here and write that it's an epic love story or a moving drama or something that makes it seem deep, you'll be disappointed. It's a fun, quick read that gives you a warm feeling when you read it.

Cat, the protagonist, is a fun, youngish (maybe, I don't actually know except that she's past college: maybe late twenties?) former stand-up comedian. She's a sweet person with a big heart, but she has "Daddy Issues." Because her father abandoned her as a child . . . or did he??? . . . she is afraid to put faith in love and pushes away anyone who gets too close.

Enter an unexpected love story.

Because of the kind of book it is, it's not a spoiler to say that there's a cute, happy feeling that will leave you feeling sort of sappy and happy. The plot is pretty basic, but there's some pretty adorable humor in it that sets it apart from the more generic romance offering. It's NOT a smut book, but there are definitely a handful of PG-13 scenes between our protagonist and her dimpled paramour.

Give it a try. I think you'll like it.

Darkly Funny, but Sort of Sweet: A Review of Mariah MacCarthy's Squad

I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't what I got.

Mariah MacCarthy's Squad  is one of those rare books that has grown on me as time has passed and I've reflected on it.

It's an odd book because there's no way to really prepare for what it's about. Basically Jenna, a teenage cheerleader, begins to go through a friend breakup from her oldest friend and reacts poorly. When it begins, you think it's going to be a coming of age story about the way we change as we get older. then, for awhile, things get really . . . dark. Jenna decides to cope with the loss of her friendship by lashing out and plotting "revenge" on a girl that she has been close to since fourth grade. When the story shifts, your expectations shift, perhaps unfairly. At that point, you think the book is going to be dark throughout, when really it is just a coming of age story.

When I was first reading this and began to realize that this was really just a regular YA fiction novel, that it wasn't morphing into mystery or some other sub genre, I felt uncomfortable with my inability to categorize what was happening. It felt like such a subversion of genre conventions: surely this obviously troubled young girl should, if nothing else, be shown getting help for her break? After all, I thought to myself, she was overreacting so greatly to losing a friendship. I mean, it's life after all. People grow apart.

Then I remembered.

I remembered being young and how intense female friendship is in your youth. I remembered that feeling of being "best friends" and how, in many ways, that relationship is even more intimate than a romantic one because of the ability to be affectionate with no expectation of sex, because of the way you share every moment and detail of your lives, the note passing, the sleepovers, the feeling that you totally can't get enough of someone. . . . and I remembered friend breakups. Man, I swear they were worse than break up break ups. They were a person who you'd totally trusted just rejecting you. the self doubt, the sadness, the feeling that you couldn't even vent about it because no one else took friendship breakups nearly as seriously (even though they'd all probably been through the same thing).

this book is so important because it's about something that hasn't already been written about a million times. It's fresh and yeah, really dark in a way that feels over the top sometimes, but still honest. for me, this book took me back and made me remember my own youth and that, for me, is always the hallmark of really nice YA.

4.5/5: Definitely recommend.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC of this awesome novel.

All Seasons, Really: A Review of Cicada Summers by Jordan Graffis

"Cry if you must. And buckle up. Because sometimes, throughout this journey, all you're surviving on is Mountain Dew and Jesus"-Cicada Summers.

The above quote isn't the most insightful one in Cicada Summers, or even the best crafted one, but it is the best at highlighting the true strengths that Graffis brings to the table with her writing: with both humor and faith, she is navigating motherhood in an honest and devoted way. It might not always be pretty (motherhood, not the writing, which is very pretty), but it's real and it's raw.

In Cicada Summers, Jordan Graffis has set up an interesting format: she is a 60 year old mother to an adult young man and she is writing to him about her wishes and prayers for his life as he enters parenthood. The form works well, I think, because it allows Graffis to take on a very reflective tone that, for the vast most part, feels extremely authentic. Each chapter blends a message on parenting with an anecdote from Graffis's own life that highlights the lesson she wants her son to learn.

Because of this form, I will say that I suspect Graffis's work lacks an audience outside mothers, but that's not a bad thing at all. In fact, it's definitely a strength. this book is not only geared towards mothers, but honest about motherhood and the struggles that come with it in a way that needs to be normalized. With refreshing candor, Graffis writes about days when her son wants to go to school in just underwear, days when poo trails through her house, and the many days she spends battling Postpartum depression. These are such necessary stories to be told, especially with such humor and joy. I think that, as a mother and a reader, that was my biggest takeaway: the joy of motherhood is so much greater than the struggles, so while we all get bogged down by the struggles, we shouldn't forget about the joy.

I think I should mention that there is another audience: full of scripture and references to faith, this book is definitely Christian literature. Now, I am a Christian, but I'm not a super devoted, church attending one and I found this book incredibly relatable. There is not one single lesson that couldn't be just as relevant to someone of another faith or with no religion at all. The major themes (overcoming huge obstacles, living life passionately and with zest) completely transcend the limits of religion, so I would have no qualms about recommending this to anyone of any faith. that said, if you are a person who would be put off by multiple references to faith and Christianity, then this isn't the book for you. However, if you are a mother and have had days where you "surviving on Mountain Dew" (or in my case, coffee), then I think you should at least give it a go. It's sweet, funny, and very uplifting, and I think we could all use a little more of that in our lives.

4/5: Definitely Recommend.

When it Rains, It Pours . . . A Review of Vera Greentea's Grimoire Noir

In an era where comics are cool and darkness reigns supreme, Grimoire Noir, the thrilling crime/fantasy graphic novel by Vera Greentea, is the perfect book for a leisurely read.

Let me admit that I'm by no means a graphic novel aficionado. I read them now and then, but no more than five a year and they really have to sound different and exciting to catch my eye. Grimoire Noir is worthy on both counts.  It's a fast read and with elements like witchcraft, mystery, dark themes and overtones, and some detective work, it immediately made me think of such tv dramas as Riverdale and The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. Not only are some of the obvious aspects there--witchcraft, especially--there are also a lot of similarities in theme: the lure of power, good and evil, cliquishness, etc.

The darkness of the artwork was very appealing and it was the art that really set the book apart. Just in case anyone reading this review is unfamiliar with the crime noir genre, noir is by nature a darker type of mystery genre. Now, noir is typically categorized by the bleakness/cynicism of the characters and I don't think that part necessarily fits: each of these characters was very hopeful about something and they were all motivated by potential. I like this subversion from the norm, though; it puts a spin on the old conventions while still staying true to the artistry. Very enjoyable!

Essentially, the plot line of the story is this: a young man lives in a town where all the girls have magical powers and all the boys are normal. His little sister has a lot of power, which has led someone to kidnap her. His dad is caught between a rock and a hard place in terms of the investigation due to the town politics and so our protagonist is tasked with saving the day.

I will say that there were times when this story line fell a bit short for me, not because it wasn't entertaining and not because it didn't have a good backstory, but just because I wanted so much more depth. There were a lot of plot lines and while Greentea does follow every thread at some point, none of the subplots were explored in enough depth to make me feel satisfied. I don't know if this is a standalone or not--the book ends with closure, but also with the potential for more--but if it is a standalone, I would be very disappointed as I feel that there is a lot of story left untold. Even if it is going to be part of a series, many of the things I feel were only shallowly explored were super relevant to this plot line and should have been explored more thoroughly here, not saved as fodder for number two. That lack of depth is what makes me think this book would definitely be better suited to a tween or very young teenager than a more seasoned reader.

Overall, my rating of this book would really vary. For an adult or even young adult reader, I'd say this is a 3.5 star (out of 5) book: good, enjoyable, but to surface to be truly great. For  a middle grade reader? Solid 4. Definitely stands apart from similar books.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC I was given in exchange for my fair and honest review.

Everybody Sucks and People are Awful: A Review of An Anonymous Girl

I am over it. Over it. All these thrillers lately seem to only serve one purpose: to see if they can top each other on creating empty, soulless characters that have no redeemable characters in order to be total Edgelords and An Anonymous Girl by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen is no different. 

I mean, I get why this one is so popular, I guess. It has a lot of twists and it is super fast paced. The tension is so well crafted that as a reader I actually felt it: fast heartbeat, catch of breath, sweaty palms. The writers are really good at pacing, which is kind of amazing because I would think it would be hard to get that down so cohesively when you have two writers working together.

 The writing is good here. The elements of good writing are mostly there. There’s even a nice symbolic falcon that dares the reader to be careful to notice any movements below the surface... It’s just the characters that had me over this book and that isn’t even the fault of Hendricks and Pekkanen. honestly, it’s not. That seems to be a new genre convention of the thriller. I just don’t like it. It has honestly gotten distracting because it really does feel like a competitive sport to see which author can create the worst cast of characters. The problem with that is there’s no one to root for because everyone’s so awful and listen, I’m no preacher over here. I had a crush on Hannibal Lecter. I totally empathized with Tony Soprano. I like a villain—-if they’re well crafted. If you see more underneath it all. I don’t expect perfection, I expect authenticity. There is not this much bad in the world and most people have more than one side.

3/5 

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC received in exchange for an honest review. 

The book I fell in love with: Review of Kate Field’s The Man I Fell in Love with

One of the things I’ve always believed about books is that there are different books for different needs and different occasions. That’s one of the reasons I’m always in the middle of a couple books at a time; I don’t want to have to read something that I like, but that I’m really not feeling. The Man I Fell in Love With by Kate Field is light and sweet, a bit sentimental, but overall, the perfect book for a weekend read or a rainy day. 

It starts with a moment that changes 

the protagonist’s life forever: at a Christmas party, Mary Black sees her husband holding hands with a man she’s never met. After he leaves her to begin his life with his new beau, Mary has to decide whether to continue her life playing it safe or to take risks for love.

Because of the type of book this is, I knew she was going to end up happy with a new love. I don’t even consider this a spoiler because you should know the conventions of a genre and this is the kind of book that pushes a “love conquers all” agenda. The only thing you didn’t really know as a reader was whether she was actually going to end up in love with a safe choice—basically a carbon copy of the ex—or the more dangerous choice.

This book was pretty charming. The romantic scenes were very sweet and everything gave you that kind of warm feeling in the pit of your stomach. There wasn’t much in the way of real drama or anxiety. The protagonist has a pretty good life and even after her husband leaves she is able to maintain the same lifestyle, not having to give up travel or the like. Still, as a character, Mary is very frustrating. She never seems to understand other people‘s intentions and she trusts the wrong people all the time. In all honesty, she’s just a bad judge of character and sometimes it’s a little hard to read. It’s the characters that are the only thing I would change about this book: it’s not that they’re poorly developed characters or even that they are unlikable. All in all they’re actually pretty well developed and for the most part felt like they were authentic. There were two exceptions: Mary‘s mother, I completely overbearing shrew, and her daughter Who is basically just a caricature of a teenage girl. Any time one of those two were in a scene, I was annoyed and just couldn’t really connect to what was happening. 

The best part about this book was how real Mary’s insecurities felt. After having kids, after your body changes, there are things that make A woman feel terribly self-conscious and I think Kate Field did a really nice job of depicting those feelings. I would recommend this book. There’s a lot of nice family interactions and romance and even a slight literary Mystery for those that don’t love the romance angle. It’s a quick read, very entertaining, and a good way to pass a lazy weekend day or maybe a beach trip. 

Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC of this book I was given in exchange for a fair and honest review. 

4/5